How to Set Healthy Boundaries
Have you been a person who can make healthy boundaries with other people? Are those boundaries important to you?
Photo by Markus Spiske on Unsplash
Many studies around the world suggest that people with healthy boundaries can develop into better individuals, even if placed in a different environment with their own unique interests and skills. Boundaries make them feel well-off, self-controlled, and self-respecting.
So, do you also think that knowing how to set boundaries is one of the most important, yet most often neglected, social skills? In fact, there are people who do not understand why boundaries are important. On the other hand, there are also people who understand but still have difficulty trying to install it.
While setting healthy boundaries with others sounds like something that's not easy to do, the root of those boundaries is clear communication. Everything that is clear is basically good, and everything that is not clear is bad. You must agree, right? So once again, boundaries start with clear communication.
The more we can express our boundaries, the more likely it is that our boundaries will be respected by others. While we may need to communicate it a few times, we shouldn't feel embarrassed and then apologize.
To this day, it is common for many people to still find it difficult to define and communicate boundaries. However, it can be learned and built on. There are several ways that we can use to help us set up and maintain boundaries.
#1 Have time for self-reflection
In order to recognize and set what boundaries we need, we must understand why each boundary is important to us and how it will benefit our well-being in the future. This is why we must take the time to sit still, reflect, and be our own 'psychological detectives'. Of the many things that happen in our lives, there must be some things that make us feel uncomfortable, but we don't know why that is. Therefore, we must learn to spend time alone to explore what is happening in our lives.
#2 Start small
If we don't have many clear boundaries right now, there's no need to feel rushed. We can start slowly. When we don't rush into thinking and setting limits, we can feel more comfortable with the process we're going through, and ultimately we can reflect on whether we're going in the right direction or need to make some adjustments.
#3 Be consistent
When processing, we may experience confusion. We may also have new expectations and demands in our relationships with others. When we feel like that, we should try to keep the boundaries that were previously thought out and set consistent and stable. This will help us strengthen our beliefs.
#4 Be wary of social media
Social media makes it very easy for us to communicate with other people. But on the other hand, social media also makes us have a blurry view of our own thoughts. Whether you realize it or not, nowadays many people share too much about themselves on social media. What's worse than this is the fact that some people also like to post other people's personal information excessively, even though the people concerned don't want it. If one day we think that certain actions taken by our friends on social media cross the boundaries of our lives, we should not hesitate in the slightest to rebuke them. What worries us will always be valid even if it happens digitally.
#5 Not afraid to speak up
As previously mentioned, communication is the most important element in having boundaries. So, we are obliged to communicate our boundaries boldly especially if someone consistently exceeds our boundaries.
LET'S SET HEALTHY LIMITS!
Those are 5 ways that we can apply together so that we can continue to learn to set self-limits. Boundaries are very important in our daily lives, for a variety of reasons that may vary. Whatever the reasons behind the boundaries we have set, we should not feel guilty. Basically, boundaries are a form of self-care.
